Gordita

There is an analogy to describe the experience of learning a new culture. It says that each culture has its own colored glasses and each person in the culture is permanently seeing the world in that color. When you move into a new culture you can put on new glasses but it’s impossible to take off your own, just as it is impossible for you to forget your culture when you leave it. So if American culture is blue and Dominican is yellow, my world right now is green. It’s very difficult for us to understand other cultures without judging them through our blue glasses. Although I may try, I can never understand what its like to be Dominican. I can only ask questions, try to understand and imagine what it looks and feels like in yellow. One of the things that is nearly impossible to see in green is that telling someone they’re fat is not offensive. “Oh, estas mas gorda!” – Oh, You are fatter! the women say to me when they haven’t seen me in a while. Although most would like to be skinny and they know it’s healthier, when they tell you that your fatter it just means that your family is feeding you well, that you are happy and healthy. Although I was blessed with “good” genes, wonderful family support and have never had body imagine issues, this, the unbalanced diet, and the fact that I actually am fatter than when I left the states, is taking a serious toll on my self esteem. I keep telling myself that it’s not the end of the world, they mean it as a compliment and reminding myself I have been running during the week. It’s the only place where you can have so many people in love with you, always telling you that your eyes, skin and hair are perfect, and still have a body imagine complex.